Who among us hasn't checked in on an ex's Twitter or perhaps even done a little reconnaissance on said ex's new partner's IG grid? Or accidentally thrown a like on an ex's sibling's engagement announcement post? Mistakenly friend requested a new partner's ex-girlfriend's mom? Anyone?
According to a recent NortonLifeLock poll, 46% of Americans surveyed admit to engaging in some form of online stalking of an ex or current partner — with 9% admitting to having created a fake profile to check on their social media. (Somehow, I know a lot of people who fall into this 9% camp.) TL;DR, it's hard not to fall prey to the creeping potential at our fingertips. And without social media, how would you be able to check in on your middle school crushes' political leanings or your freshman dorm hookup who just had a baby?
Since almost half of us are admitting to doing it, we asked for your juiciest stories of the cyber-stalking-exes variety, and you delivered. From Instagram creeping gone wrong to regular LinkedIn check-ins, ahead are seven real-life tales of what happens when you social media stalk your ex. Spoiler: At least one person logged into their ex's Facebook and sabotaged his new relationship by impersonating his sister over Messenger. The savagery!"I had an ex who was pretty manipulative and really mean and caused me a lot of mental health issues after we broke up. Eventually I moved on, met someone new, and was very happy, and then they started to occasionally reach out and ask if they could come to parties that I would be at. I was like... no. They kept texting me or liking my shit on social media and I hated it, so I blocked their number and blocked them on Instagram.
"I worked in social media at the time, so I had my work's IG attached to my account, and I would go onto this account to stalk my ex that way and make sure they weren't going to the same parties as me or fucking over other girls after me (update: they were). I literally found out via this very ridiculous stalking method that they transitioned and changed their name after we broke up. We have very few friends in common at this point, but I still check in every few months to make sure we aren't accidentally living in the same neighborhood or something." — Stacey, 35"I watch my ex-boyfriend's ex-girlfriend's Instagram story almost daily and I have no shame about it. (We don't know each other nor do we follow each other, and she definitely notices that I watch and probably thinks it's weird, but whatever.) I don't even communicate with my ex-boyfriend anymore, and he is two years into a relationship with a new girlfriend (who I blocked on all social media because I don't want to see pictures of them). But for some reason, I am still obsessed with stalking his ex-girlfriend from before we even dated. If I ever meet her in person, which I very well might, that will be awkward, considering I often watch her Stories within 45 seconds of her posting them." —Anna, 25"I don't anymore, but in my late 20s and early 30s, this was my favorite pastime. Once, after a few glasses of wine, I typed the name of my boyfriend's ex into Facebook thinking that I was in the search box. I was actually in the status box. So just her name was my Facebook status for a WHILE until I realized (this was 2011, when that meant something.)" —Leah, 39"I have been with my current partner for a long time so I don't really think about my exes all that often. I unfriended a lot the guys I casually dated in my early 20s so I wouldn't be tempted to stalk the fuckbois that did shitty things to me. As for my current partner, our lives are so intertwined, I don't feel like I would learn anything new about him by looking at his social media accounts. He only has Facebook anyway and barely ever uses it.
"The only guy I occasionally stalk is my high school boyfriend. He lives a drastically different life than I do, and I find it interesting to scroll through his Instagram every now and then. Recently, while looking at a photo he posted on Instagram of a woman he is newly dating, I noticed that my mom had liked it. It wasn't even a normal picture. He fancies himself an artist, and the pic was black-and-white and showed the new GF wrapped in only a bed sheet. I was like, WTF mom?! I sent a screenshot to my sister who also thought it was insane that our mother liked a half-naked photo of a woman my ex was dating, but I know my mom probably didn't realize who it was or what she was doing. She might not have even meant to like it. TBH though, I thought it was hilarious." —Olivia, 27"I check my most recent ex's Instagram quite often but from an account he doesn't know I have, that he wouldn't tie back to me. I check his Facebook too, but he doesn't post as much there. I even check his LinkedIn and figured out that he moved cities for a job but then had to move back because it didn't work out!
"In the case of a different ex, I knew all of his passwords and we ended on quite a bad note, so we blocked each other on everything. I used to just go into his account and see who he was talking to or what he was posting for like a month after we broke up. It was really bad and I regret it a lot. We're friends now... but he still doesn't know that I did this." —Jessica, 19"Dated him for six and a half years. He’s off the grid and doesn’t believe in social media. I stalk his new girlfriend. I say new, but they’ve now been dating for four years. I use Instagram because hers is open to the public and it’s super easy to creep.
"I used to know his Gmail login, and I would log on and read all his emails. I saw everything he sent to his parents, his resume to new jobs, etc. You can literally see what they Google on their account! I used to see what areas he was traveling between. I saw one day about a year after we broke up that he was going on a trip with his new GF. I saw his hotel room confirmation. I hit 'cancel reservation' and then deleted all evidence sent to his email. About two weeks after, he changed his email password." — Annaleigh, 28 "I have both a fake Facebook and Instagram account that I use to stalk my ex because I have him blocked. We broke up in 2013.
"I'd recently broken up with him and heard he was seeing somebody new. I still had his login info for Facebook Messenger and logged on and saw his new girlfriend was online. She knew that he was busy at the time and couldn't be logged on, but before I could think of a lie, she asked if it was his little sister (they shared a computer). I said yes and asked whether she was the girl who came around and spent all night in his room last week. She said no and asked who the girl was. I said, 'Oops, I'm not supposed to say.'
"When he found out, my ex-boyfriend immediately figured out that it was me and told me they nearly broke up over it!" —Alex, 33
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